Mad Dogs and Englishmen may go out in the midday sun according to Noel Coward, but after the sun goes down they all seem to end up at Mad Dogs Saloon, San Antonio, Texas. For two nights in a row Mad Dogs was an experience keeping with its namesake. A family from Wisconsin had flown down to San Antonio for one night of Tequila and Mexican food. Daughter and sister-in-law danced together as if they were working at Big Al’s on Bourbon Street. Mother Wisconsin, watching them rub up together would just shake her head. Father and son Wisconsin were in a semi-heated discussion with my Aussie friend and I simply sat with beer in hand, eyes focused on the dancing duo and ears tuned into the discussion in the event that lines got drawn, sand got kicked, and I’d be needed to even up the sides. Father Wisconsin had met and passed his Tequila limit and his points-of-view on subjects, any subject, were influenced by el Patron. Son Wisconsin, wearing a stupid-looking, oversized [even for his big head] cowboy hat wasn’t aware that his mouth had broken all ties with his brain, and made his best and loudest attempt to step up when his father stumbled. Only by virtue of my friends patience, and a desire not to be kicked out or arrested, did Wisconsin Son not find himself kissing Mad Dogs floor. Meanwhile, the sister act was heating up, and that was were my attention was focused, if a fight did break out, I could always be called upon… ‘yeah, yeah, yeah, got your back, Wayne, just give me a minute, these two girls are very entertaining!’
Night two, back again in Mad Dogs. Wisconsinners are back with the cows, but Mad Dogs isn’t short of replacements. With the convention center located at the far end of the Riverwalk, we shared the bar with three young ladies attending a marketing convention; Lisa from Dallas Texas, and the other two from the state of confusion. Had the bar been a mud ring, we’d have had better entertainment than the previous night. Lisa vs the tag team from wherever. I used to love it when the circus came to town. That night it had been replaced by the convention, not a whole lot of difference between the two.
History…Mad Dogs was founded in 1984 in what was the British Crown Colony of Hong Kong. The name comes from the title of a poem scripted by Noel Coward, a distinguished British playwright, director and thespian [sorry Lisa, that’s thespian].
“Mad Dogs’ and Englishmen [Noel Coward] In tropical climes there are certain times of day.
When all the citizens retire, to tear their clothes off and perspire.
It’s one of those rules that the biggest fools obey,
Because the sun is much too sultry and one must avoid its ultry-violet ray —
Papalaka-papalaka-papalaka-boo.
Digariga-digariga-digariga-doo.
The natives grieve when the white men leave their huts,
Because they’re obviously, absolutely nuts”
Mad Dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun.
The Japanese don’t care to,
the Chinese wouldn’t dare to,
Hindus and Argentines sleep firmly from twelve to one,
But Englishmen detest a siesta,
In the Philippines there are lovely screens,
to protect you from the glare,
In the Malay states there are hats like plates,
which the Britishers won’t wear,
At twelve noon the natives swoon,
and no further work is done –
But Mad Dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun…
